What has been going on in the world of news while we've all been asleep?

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Gareth Gates
, Samantha Mumba and Suzanne from Hear'Say are all
going to be wearing a lot of sequins in the not-too-distant future. ('Gates Joins Dancing On Ice Stars' — BBC News)

» Amy Winehouse offi­cially nobbled no-one to try and get her husband out of jail. ('Amy Winehouse In Clear…' — News Of The World)

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Alesha Dixon's
new boyfriend likes texting people pho­to­graphs of his genitals. ('Alesha Dixon Falls For Eastenders Bad Boy' — Entertainmentwise)

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The LAPD have not found the supposed gun that Britney was sup­posedly waving around at her supposed house last week. ('Britney Spears Hostage Drama: No Gun Found' — Entertainmentwise)

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Simon Cowell has unsur­pris­ingly signed Rhydian Roberts to his record label. ('X Factor's Rhydian Lands Contract' — BBC News)

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Ashanti is worried that people will think she is a 'slut' due to her role in the most recent 'Resident Evil' movie. A slut who gets pecked to death by a load of birds in the first ten minutes, but a slut non­ethe­less. ('Ashanti 'slut' Worries' — The Mirror)

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Lolz, Lily Allen isn't a fan of text speak. ('Lily Upset By Texters' — The Mirror)


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The most bought album of the past seven days is one which has been free for the past few months. ('Radiohead Get Physical' — The Guardian)

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Jessica Simpson
has been on holiday with her enormous new boyfriend and enormous white teeth. ('Jess' Holiday Romo-Ance' — The Sun)

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Robyn
made up that story about seeing her ex-boyfriend at the station and he most certainly did not bend down to tie up anyone's laces. ('You Got A Problem With Robyn' — The Times)

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Courtney Love
has shoved her intriguing nose into Britney's affairs with some invalu­able advice. ('Courtney Love Chimes In On Britney Spears' — Popbytes)

Blimey!