You recall, of course, that a lot of Madonna's 'Hard Candy' pro­mo­tional nonsense was simply some normal stuff with a Madonna sticker on it.

We wondered, the other day, whether there was any other 'Hard Candy' mer­chand­ise knocking around, and imagine our surprise when we uncovered this bottle of 'Hard Candy' wine!

And this sought after 'Hard Candy' filing cabinet!

And this limited edition 'Hard Candy' air horn!

And this exclusive 'Hard Candy' hole punch!

These not-available-in-the-shops 'Hard Candy' camping mats are amazing.

Are you jealous of our 'Hard Candy' tennis ball?

*Tumbleweed blows across cyber­space*