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Suggested improvements to The Saturdays' 'Disco Love'

the-saturdays-on-the-beach

It's two months until The Saturdays' 'Disco Love' is released, which is a bit of a pain in the arse vis-à-vis the whole 'buying it' thing but this delay at least means the band will have time to implement these important fixes before the proper version goes on sale.

1
Problematic Thing: Let's tackle the most con­tro­ver­sial and offensive problem first. We're talking, of course, about the line "the DJ playing 'Hit Me Baby One More Time'. The song — one of the greatest songs in pop history — is called '…Baby One More Time'.
Easy Fix: Obviously nobody wants to hear dot-dot-dot in a pop record but there is an easy work­around. Switch "the DJ playing 'Hit Me Baby One More Time'" to "the DJ plays ellipsis 'One More Time'", which could also be a delib­er­ately ambiguous lyric that suggests a dramatic pause (…) then 'One More Time', a hit single by current disco so-called 'prac­ti­tion­ers' Daft Punk. (A second fix would be for the line to go "Britney — '…Baby One More Time'", obviously.)

2
Problematic Thing: Donna Summer is mentioned, but no song is referenced.
Easy Fix: Change chorus lyric from "oh, is it love that's in the air" to "oh, I feel love, it's in the air".

3
Problematic thing: No mention of glitterballs.
Easy Fix: In the second verse "got me wanting the physical, the physi-physical" should change to "got me under the glit­ter­ball, it's physi-physical".

4
Problematic thing: They mention the year 1999, which was also mentioned in their last single. This should be acknow­ledged, or it seems like they don't know what they're doing.
Easy Fix: Just chuck in a wailing "niney-niney-NIINE" 'BV' after 1999 is mentioned.

5
Problematic Thing: Intertextual cross-ref­er­en­cing pop singles should really pull out all the stops, and 'Disco Love' misses an easy oppor­tun­ity to reference Kylie's 'Step Back In Time' which, itself, is a cel­eb­ra­tion of The Old Days / The O'Jays etc.
Easy Fix: Change the lineing "you take me back in time" to "it's a Step Back In Time" would work. Alternatively they could chuck in another verse that ends like "you take me back in time to 1999" but use a line like "that 1990 rhyme, we're stepping back in time". However it's done, the result will be an Inception-style memory within a memory moment of pop genius.

Oh and it needs some disco zapping noises.