BOSNIA AND HERZEGOVINA V IRAN
Guest referee: Jon Gabony — DJ and writer
‘Handball Fans’ — 'Državna himna Bosne i Hercegovine'
“There’s an old saying: a national anthem is for life, not just for football tournaments. As far as old sayings go it’s neither memorable nor meaningful. It isn’t even old; I just made it up, but it’s 5pm on a Wednesday and we’ve all had a drink, so let’s crack on. Sadly, whichever way you look at it, Bosnia and Herzegovina’s national anthem, ‘Državna himna Bosne i Hercegovine’, isn’t exactly an evergreen classic. Chanted with considerable ‘brio’ by the lively crowd at a Sarajevo handball tournament, the song is unremittingly dreary. Call me a ruthless pragmatist, but they really should have put a donk on it. ‘Of note’, however, is that the performance and the song all feature the following pop iconography: 1) a cappella choral intro ( ‘A Red Letter Day’) 2) bleachers (‘…Baby One More Time’) and 3) flags (the replacement ‘American Life’ video). Of further note is the regrettable fact that the above three key signifiers of pop amazingness are, to a man, entirely misleading. Where’s the Beckett reference sat ‘atop’ a Motiv8 bassline? Where’s Britney? And where the bloody hell is Madonna rapping about her soy latte? I'll allow a reluctant point, given that this footage was filmed at Skenderija, my favourite of all the Sarajevo arenas, but I won’t lie to you, ‘Državna himna Bosne i Hercegovine’ is a disappointment.”
David Debono — 'National Anthem of the Islamic Republic of Iran'
“Representing Iran is your friend and mine, David Debono. The keen-eyed among you will doubtless remember Debono from his victory in last night's duel, ‘tinkling the ivories’ for the Ivory Coast. Well, readers, he's back, Back, BACK! Today, David tackles the Iranian national anthem, the imaginatively titled 'National Anthem of the Islamic Republic of Iran'. Rendered faithfully if not a little showily, it's a corker: stately, melodic and concise. What else can we 'glean' from the footage? Well all of Debono's rich performance history is here. A thoughtfully choreographed camera angle, achieving the optimum piano keys/pianist ratio, comprehensively displaying both man and music? Tick! Classic Debono. An unambiguously tangible air of blithe unconcern, paired with the mirth of frequent and barely contained selfLOLs, engendering the sense of an artist both inhabiting the nonsense of World Cup ‘fever’ yet remaining resolutely above it? Check! A pair of utterly incongruous board shorts, further undermining the solemnity of proceedings? GOOAAAALLLLLL! Imperial Debono."
Jon's full time score:
Bosnia and Herzegovina 1 — Iran 3
Now you can vote for your own favourite.[poll id="54"]
Next up: Ecuador vs France and Honduras vs Switzerland