Here (right) is the video for Pink's 100% terrible new single, 'Nobody Knows'.
It is the video you may have read about a few weeks ago in which she gets her clothes off, and when you hear the song you will know why she felt that the whole release might have needed a little helping hand.
Of course, this single 'drops' just as her last single, 'U + Ur Hand', continues to get better with every single listen.
For this reason we think instead of making baps-ahoy videos in an attempt to drum up interest for lame-o-ramic efforts like 'Nobody Knows', Pink should abandon the release completely and just re-release 'U + Ur Hand'.
Think of the benefits to this brave new marketing concept.
- No need to shoot a video — there has already been one made. This saves around $100,000.
- Similarly, there are no costs associated with designing a new single sleeve, because one has already been designed. We do not know how much money this will save but the usual cost is probably vastly out of proportion to the fact that all you have to do is chuck a logo on a photograph.
- Money is saved on radio plugging — because radio is already playing 'U + Ur Hand'. Employing our amazing new idea, no CDs will need sending to radio or, for that matter, press.
This has to be the way forward not just for Pink but for all major artists. We will have a word with her record label about this idea and let you know how we get on.