This is not a drill. Lady Gaga has declared a
Here are eight ways to prepare for impending popocalypse.
1. Stand under a doorframe. Make sure the freaks are on the outside and that you've locked the fucking doors.
2. Listen to 'Bad Romance' a bit, that's a nice song isn't it.
3. Pull together food from the fridge — bacon, sausages, literally anything that will keep you warm.
4. In case of drought, fill your bath with Pop Water.
5. If hyperventilating, lie on the floor and go "HEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYY".
6. During the POP EMERGENCY, phone networks may go down. If you are out in a club and you're sipping that bub, head home.
7. During a POP EMERGENCY it is natural among any social group for leaders to emerge. Follow the advice of your nearest pop scholar, or failing that anyone who has been making music for ten years. Trust them and only them!
8. The sound of a POP EMERGENCY may be loud and unpleasant. Cover your ears only with high quality ear protectors. NOT LAPTOP SPEAKERS.
Good luck!
