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A NumberOnesdump for 2011: from Cardle's authentic noise to ladies missing 'our boys'

  • December 26, 2011
  • Popjustice

People keep going "oh the singles chart doesn't mean anything any more BLAH BLAH BLAH WHAT TIME'S ANTIQUES ROADSHOW ON OOH MY BACK'S GIVING ME JIP ETC" but a Number One single is still a Number One single and you can't argue with that.

2011's Number Ones began with Matt Cardle, ended with the Military Wives and — somewhere in the middle — got even worse but, in parts, a lot better too.

Here are all the singles that were Number One in 2011, in the order that they hit Number One. A couple (Adele, Rihanna and Calvin) were Number One twice, due to double amazingness.

» Matt Cardle — 'When We Collide'
» Rihanna feat Drake — 'What's My Name?'
» Bruno Mars — 'Grenade' <<< BOLLOCKS THIS SHOULD HAVE BEEN ON OUR TOP 45 SINGLES LIST
» Kesha — 'We R Who We R' <<< AND THIS
» Jessie J feat B.o.B — 'Price Tag'
» Adele — 'Someone Like You'
» Nicole Scherzinger — 'Don't Hold Your Breath'
» Jennifer Lopez feat Pitbull — 'On the Floor'
» LMFAO feat Lauren Bennett and GoonRock — 'Party Rock Anthem'
» Bruno Mars — 'The Lazy Song'
» Pitbull feat Ne-Yo, Afrojack and Nayer — 'Give Me Everything'
» Example — 'Changed the Way You Kiss Me'
» Jason Derülo — 'Don't Wanna Go Home'
» DJ Fresh feat Sian Evans — 'Louder'
» The Wanted — 'Glad You Came'
» JLS feat Dev — 'She Makes Me Wanna'
» Cher Lloyd — 'Swagger Jagger'
» Nero — 'Promises'
» Wretch 32 feat Josh Kumra — 'Don't Go'
» Olly Murs feat Rizzle Kicks — 'Heart Skips a Beat'
» Example — 'Stay Awake'
» Pixie Lott — 'All About Tonight'
» One Direction — 'What Makes You Beautiful'
» Dappy — 'No Regrets'
» Sak Noel — 'Loca People'
» Rihanna feat Calvin Harris — 'We Found Love'
» Professor Green featuring Emeli Sandé — 'Read All About It'
» The X Factor Finalists 2011 feat JLS & One Direction — 'Wishing on a Star'
» Olly Murs — 'Dance with Me Tonight'
» Little Mix — 'Cannonball'
» Military Wives with Gareth Malone — 'Wherever You Are'

 

SOME 'STATS'

Number One singles: 31
X Factor-related acts (half marks for a
featured artist)
: 9
Artists you'd expect to see in a similar list five years from now (half marks for a
featured artist)
: 6
Solo women (half marks for a featured artist): 10.5
Solo men (half marks for a
featured artist)
: 19
Bands (half marks for a
featured artist)
: 11
Proper guitar-type bands: 0
Actual ballads: 4
Mid-tempos: 7
Cover versions: 2
In The Club and/or dancing stuff: 12
Songs spe­cific­ally about going to spain, seeing people partying and thinking to yourself, 'what the fuck?': 1
Ludicrous 'inter­pol­a­tions' of either 'The Lambada', 'My Darling
Clementine' or 'Day‑O The Banana Boat Song': 3


AND NOW HERE'S THE LIST IN ORDER OF HOW GOOD THE SONGS ACTUALLY ARE

1. Rihanna feat Calvin Harris — 'We Found Love'
2. Olly Murs feat Rizzle Kicks — 'Heart Skips a Beat'
3. Nicole Scherzinger — 'Don't Hold Your Breath'
4. Adele — 'Someone Like You'
5. One Direction — 'What Makes You Beautiful'
6. Example — 'Changed the Way You Kiss Me'
7. Rihanna feat Drake — 'What's My Name?'
8. Bruno Mars — 'Grenade'
9. Nero — 'Promises'
10. Kesha — 'We R Who We R'
11. DJ Fresh feat Sian Evans — 'Louder'
12. Jennifer Lopez feat Pitbull — 'On the Floor'
13. JLS feat Dev — 'She Makes Me Wanna'
14. Jessie J feat B.o.B — 'Price Tag'
15. Pixie Lott — 'All About Tonight'
16. Dappy — 'No Regrets'
17. Sak Noel — 'Loca People'
18. Professor Green featuring Emeli Sandé — 'Read All About It'
19. LMFAO feat Lauren Bennett and GoonRock — 'Party Rock Anthem'
20. Example — 'Stay Awake'
21. Wretch 32 feat Josh Kumra — 'Don't Go'
22. Cher Lloyd — 'Swagger Jagger'
23. The Wanted — 'Glad You Came'
24. Jason Derülo — 'Don't Wanna Go Home'
25. Military Wives — 'Where You Are'
26. Matt Cardle — 'When We Collide'
27. The X Factor Finalists 2011 feat JLS & One Direction — 'Wishing on a Star'
28. Little Mix — 'Cannonball'
29. Pitbull feat Ne-Yo, Afrojack and Nayer — 'Give Me Everything'
30. Olly Murs — 'Dance with Me Tonight'
31. Bruno Mars — 'The Lazy Song'

It's quite exciting looking at the list — utter shit as a good pro­por­tion of it is — knowing that this time last year we had no idea that most of the decent songs would ever exist. Which suggests that there is just as much amaz­ing­ness due to arrive at the 'top spot' during the next twelve months. BRACE YOURSELVES.

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2011 In Review: Eric Saade does February

  • December 26, 2011
  • Popjustice
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2011 In Review: Featuring a cast of thousands*

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    Congratulations to Charli XCX and Lorde: winners of the 2024 Popjustice Twenty Quid Music Prize
  • 2
    The 2024 Twenty Quid Music Prize: Shortlist
  • 3
    The 2023 Popjustice Twenty Quid Music Prize: Shortlist
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    Fine, let's do a Substack then.
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    The 2022 Popjustice Twenty Quid Music Prize: shortlist
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    2021 Popjustice Twenty Quid Music Prize: Laura Mvula wins
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