Let's use a crudely scrawled cock and balls to spoil the ballot paper of recycled news:
» Louis Walsh says Jedward are "going to be so big this year, mark my words". (Digital Spy) Mark them with what, Louis? A gravestone reading 'HERE LIES POP MUSIC 1950s — 2010, MESSILY KILLED BY LOUIS WALSH'?
» Daily Star gossip vixen Kim Dawson has listened to some of Christina Aguilera's album and finds some positive things to say. (Daily Star)
» Diana Vickers and Plan B are 'battling it out' for the albums chart Number One. (NME)
» Lady Gaga performed 'Alejandro' on American Idol last night. (YouTube) There has been some hoo-ha about Idol cutting the performance for broadcast.
» Kylie's songs will be made into a new musical, presumably the same one first reported on in 2008. (Daily Star) Much as we are a fan of warbling pop sensation Kylie Minogue we require some convincing that this will be extremely good.
And that is your lot.