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Proposed script for tomorrow morning's S Club 7 event

  • November 16, 2014
  • Popjustice

article-0-00480a0300000258-435_634x463

Thank you for coming this morning! Great to see so many familiar faces.

We’ve invited you here today to make a very special announce­ment. Some of you can probably guess what we’ve been planning today, but we’ve done our best to keep it all a secret until this morning!

Long story short, we’re splitting up.

On Friday night we had a chance to show the world that we could make sense in 2014. We had a chance to show the world that we wanted to make sense in 2014. We managed neither of those things.

Did we blow it? Not really. Instead, we were honest.

We were honest with you on Friday night in the same way we’re being honest with you this morning. We can’t do it in 2014 and, having taken a vote, it turns out the majority of us don’t really want to.

Our comeback ends this morning. It’s a comeback that lasted for a weekend. That feels about right to us. There will be no tour — even we wouldn't have the audacity to try and launch a tour after Friday's per­form­ance. There will be no new music. We’re not playing Hyde Park. There will not be a reality TV show on ITV Be showing us getting back into shape ahead of the greatest challenge of our lives. There will not be a fragrance.

Pop music is a wonderful thing. The best thing in the world. We defy anybody to ever tell us that pop should 'know its place'. But we also under­stand that sometimes pop should know its time. And the time for the pop we made ended, quite naturally, over a decade ago. Another type of pop took its place. Then another one, and another one.

The pop of 2014 doesn’t sound like ‘Reach’, and the voices of S Club in 2014 don’t sound like the vocals you know on ‘Reach’, either. We only really ever had two great singers. Now we have one. 1:6 is not a great ratio when it comes to live per­form­ance. Maybe that’s why Children In Need stuck us on after 10:30pm. Or maybe they monitored the buzz after we’d announced the per­form­ance and realised that we weren’t going to be another McBusted.

Maybe there is demand for a tour. But that's not the point. We know some of our former fans would come to see us live. But we know after Friday night that they would go away dis­ap­poin­ted. We know that however many “WOOOO!!!” noises we made on stage, we wouldn’t be feeling “WOOOO”. We’d be feeling sad. We think that sadness would infect our audience. We do not want to spread sadness. That’s the reason we split up in 2002, and it’s the reason we’re splitting up in 2014. We couldn’t do it to ourselves again. We couldn’t do it to you again. You deserve better.

The S Club party is finally over. We’re glad, and you should be too.

BYE

S Club 7
x

PS: Rachel's done a new album with Richard X and it's out next Monday.
PPS: We're going to be mentoring a new version of S Club. They're great. Cathy Dennis co-wrote their first single with Charli XCX and it's out the Monday after Rachel's album.

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