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101 Uses For A Defunct Popstar

  • July 27, 2007
  • Popjustice

NUMBER 86: CHUCK THEM IN A DODGY AD CAMPAIGN

Three's a trend…

Exhibit A: Rachel Stevens On The Verge Of Being Spitroasted And Being Able To See It All Very Clearly

Here is a picture of a familiar looking young woman who appears thrilled at the prospect of group sex with the two men pictured.

Apart from the fact that Rachel is not credited in the ad and is basically finding employ­ment as a 'model', what message do we take from the above advert? That daily contact lenses are designed for those with a penchant for promis­cu­ity.

Exhibit B: Alesha Dixon Advertising A Shop Which Sells Rubbish Training Shoes

Here's Alesha Dixon doing an ad for JDWoman.com.

Alesha's failture to 'connect' as a solo popstrel is genuinely one of the bigger pop­in­justices of the last seven years but at least she still looks almigh­tily fit and can get away with standing in front of a camera standing still for a bit and pass it all off as 'real work'.

Exhibit C: The Liberty X Girls Advertising Amazing New Tampons Which Stop Stuff Going Everywhere

Blimey. Click here
to win a 'shopping spree' (five minute trip to Primark) with The Girls Of Liberty X.

Readers! Have you seen a pop per­son­al­ity from the recent past advert­ising something fairly ropey? Let us know. And yes we know Cheryl Baker's hair isn't falling out any more.

  • Alesha Dixon
  • Cher
  • liberty x
  • rachel stevens
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While we're at it…

  • July 27, 2007
  • Popjustice
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They can't even give it away (except they can) (and are)

  • July 27, 2007
  • Popjustice
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Pop as in popular
  • 1
    New Music Friday: Let's kick off 2021 with some KLF
  • 2
    The Top 45 Singles Of 2020
Further listening
Greatest hits
  • Patrick Wolf interview: "Bring a cushion"
  • Robbie Williams interview
  • Calvin Harris interview: "I don’t work on anyone else’s songs any more. I’ve had enough of all that"
Further reading
  • 1
    New Music Friday: Let's kick off 2021 with some KLF
  • 2
    The Top 45 Singles Of 2020
  • 3
    New Music Friday: Mae Muller doesn't want to be dependent
  • 4
    New Music Friday: There's a big one from Royal & The Serpent
  • 5
    New Music Friday: Baby Queen takes the throne
  • 6
    Twenty Quid 2020: Dua Lipa is the winner
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