AN ARTICLE
Sia and her dogs

“I am a dog lady dogging it up”

The not-normal Sia tells us about her dogs…

By day Sia is an amazing singer who sings depressing and often very good songs with boring people like Zero 7.

In her spare time she rolls around in her bed smelling like dogs. Here is the proof in an amazing illustrated guide to some things she has told us about her canine pals.

“I’m feeling great today, I’m in bed with my dogs.”

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“I smell like dogs.”

“I love dogs. I have dogs. I got dogs. I am a dog lover. I’m a dog lady dogging it up.”

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“I rescued Pantera first – he was a stray – and he is a total motherfucker and then I didn’t really realize what a nutjob he was until I got Lick-Lick Science who’s got three legs.”

“Lick-Lick Science is like a hairy slug and their personalities are so opposing.”

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“The dogs get on now but when Lick-Lick first arrived Pantera wanted to fucking eat his head. It was so scary and Pantera attacked him five or six times in the first few days and it was awful.”

“I wouldn’t consider having them put down. I had to dominate and really send out some alpha-vibes and after I did that they started to feel safer, like they were packmates and I ran them around next to each other, one leash in each hand and it made me feel really strong.”

“Now they understand that I’m the leader they don’t need to fight among themselves any more, there’s no need for any mid-hierarchical fighting.”

“Fortunately these days they take all the aggression out on their toys. In fact Lick-Lick doesn’t take it out on anything, he’s just a fucking lover.”

“Pantera is always trying to show you how good he is at killing the things that is in his mouth like ‘oh look I’m killing the giraffe’.”

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“There is a lot of soft toy action at my house and he is pretty much constantly trying to show what a good job of killing things he can make.”

Thank you very much for that, Sia.

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