We think the simple names of these singers will do the job so we’ll just put them in a list (as found here) for you all to stare at.

Katy Perry, Cheryl ‘Cheryl’ Cole, The Saturdays, Scissor Sisters, Little Mix, Pixie Lott, Little Boots, Katy B and (last and most definitely least) Tinchy Stryder.

There is also Nicola Roberts acting as a ‘mentor’ too.

Amazing.

In an interview you can read just here, the ‘Mainstream Money’ hitmaker announced details of his upcoming release, saying: “I’ve got a new single coming out in mid-August called ‘Help Me’.”

“I’m about to cause like a rainstorm, and heavy crazy,” added the singer.

We assume this is some kind of metaphor.

Tinchy then went on to discuss his album a bit, noting: “I don’t want to rush it, I’ve put a few singles out and the gap’s getting quite big. I might put a few singles together and let them have a little package or something. I’ve got a lot of album material.”

‘Little package’.

Tinchy tweeted: ”Gossip Gossip all I hear is gossip lol… We dealing with facts not rumours over here yo! ;).” He later added: ”Seeing is believing, You stay there stuck believing what you’re reading…. Haaahaaa.”

Meanwhile, Wiley tweeted ”watch out for #celebritybigbrother 2012″, suggesting that he would be moving into Channel 5′s BB house with confirmed housemate Frankie Cocozza on January 5.

If true, it will mean that Wiley will be locked away in front of millions of TV viewers and will unfortunately miss the planned high-profile release of his album ‘Evolve Or Be Extinct’ on January 19.

Wiley will join other illustrious music luminaries who’ve appeared on the show including Kenzie, Coolio, Sisqo, Dane Bowers and Jedward.

Little Mix’s ‘Cannonball’ got to Number One with sales of over 210,000 (The Official Charts) but it looks more likely that Gareth Malone and the Military Wives will be this year’s thrilling Christmas Number One.

Cher Lloyd has signed a US record deal with LA Reid’s Epic Records. (Capital FM) Reid was of course the man who dropped Lady Gaga, but who also signed just about every other successful popstar in recent memory. A swing with a telephone on its head; some roundabouts with platinum albums.

‘Gangsta?’ hitmaker Tinchy Stryder will be following in the footsteps of Dane Bowers, Sisqo and Jedward by taking part in the next series of Celebrity Big Brother. (The Sun)

In news that in no way suggests Rihanna should maybe take a break, she had to leave the stage in Portugal during a performance of ‘What’s My Name?’ in order to throw up. (Ace Showbiz) But she made it back in time for ‘Rudeboy’, so that’s all okay.

In popstar engagement news even more exciting than Britney’s, Una from The Saturdays will be tying the knot, having announcing her engagement during what the Mirror describe as a ‘packed out’ gig on Friday night. (Daily Mirror)

Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber and Paula Abdul have been named among the Best Mannered People of 2011. (Contactmusic) Kate Middleton won the award, presumably for taking over the dancefloor in a polite fashion.

And finally, in ‘oh look this will have to do’ news, Katy Perry has ‘enlisted’ friend-of-Bruno-Mars-B.o.B for a remix of ‘The One That Got Away’, in an attempt to break the record number of Hot 100 Number One singles from one album. (MTV) Fantastic work everyone.

THAT WAS some of THE NEWS.

Except when she cries it just sounds like an air horn and people point and laugh. :(

(This is Tinchy and Dionne doing the Official Olympic Torch Relay Song.)

(We wonder if there is an official song for every single aspect of the Olympics, thereby allowing any number of failing major label acts a chance to attach themselves to something people are sort of interested in?)

(If so, can we nominate Ed Drewett for something please – maybe Officlal Olympic Ice Cream Vans Outside The Velodrome Song or something like that.)

(Cheers.)

That is its logo. It’s basically a live pop showcase spinoff concert thing from The Hits Radio and some of the lineup is quite good, too.

Here’s who’s there.

» Soundgirl.
» Six D
» Oh My!
» Tinchy & Dappy
» Wretch 32
» Her Majesty & The Wolves
» Talay Riley

Yes it tails off a bit near the end but the ones at the top are good, right? RIGHT.

We’ve got 25 (TWENTY FIVE) pairs of tickets to give away.

Click here to enter this competition. Competition closes 9am on Monday.

There’s more info on Future Hits Live here, and if you don’t win ticktes you can pay for some with money here.

We didn’t put ‘tail’ to start with but it looked a bit wrong what with Dionne being Reasonably Young. DISASTER AVERTED.