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Story filed Friday, 28 August 2009 |
Erik Hassle loves his toaster.
Erik Hassle wonders to himself whether his toaster might be better off
in the wild, allowed to frolic and gambol in the summer sun. Toasters are not meant to be kept inside. It is all a bit like in that Sting song about if you love someone (or a
toaster) set them free.
Erik Hassle says to his toaster, "we are going for a walk". The toaster jumps up and hugs Erik. The toaster is so excited. Erik, meanwhile, knows what is about to happen. His face cannot lie. This will be a sad day. This will be his last walk with the toaster.
Erik and the toaster are in a nearby park. "Just a little bit further," Erik tells the toaster. "Not long to go now."
Suddenly: "fetch!". Erik throws a crumpet, and the toaster instinctively chases after it. While the toaster rummages for its reward in a nearby bush Erik turns around and begins to walk away. By the time the toaster emerges, looking for its friend, Erik is gone forever.
Three days later the toaster takes shelter under a tree. Cold, lost, lonely, upset, confused. It knows nothing of life in the wild and simply cannot adapt. When the summer turns to autumn this toaster will almost certainly perish and it will perish without ever knowing how much it is loved.
All that remains now is a memory. A memory of a toaster.
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