Major label act in ‘free download of actually brilliant song’ shocker

It’s taking so long for Mini Viva to put a foot wrong that when they do eventually do something shit it will represent such a massive accumulation of badness that its unimaginable ineptitude will take physical form and soar up into the sky like a massive out of control monster (eg Godzilla or similar) – a sight that will be obviously amazing and will therefore ultimately not be bad at all, meaning that its whole existence will dictate that it is sucked into a paradoxical conceptual plughole dragging All Human Life with it.

In the meantime, they’re offering a free download of a song called ‘Bedroom Viber’.

Bad news: You have to sign up to a mailing list.
Good news: It’s actually really good, unlike most of the chronic old tat labels chuck out in exchange for your ‘data’.

Of course if you’re phenomenally well paid the ‘value’ of such an offer is open to debate. If, for example, registering for this download (value: £0.79 at iTunes rates) takes two minutes of your time, and if you are paid more than £23.50 an hour in your job, it will actually cost you money to get involved, and we suggest you wait for the song to be properly released on their album SO THAT YOU CAN LISTEN TO IT ON YOUR DIAMOND ENCRUSTED iPOD YOU CHAMPAGNE SWILLING OYSTER BUMMING HOITY TOITY GIT.